How This Grace & Courtesy Printable Pack Turns “Chores” into Games

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines courtesy as "behavior marked by polished manners or respect for others." In the Montessori method, an emphasis is placed on Grace and Courtesy as a core part of a child's education. Grace and Courtesy means helping our children develop habits and manners that allow them to show politeness and care for themselves, their loved ones, their environment, their pets, and their community.

🌿 What Montessori says about Grace and Courtesy: Maria Montessori placed Grace and Courtesy at the heart of the practical life curriculum, particularly for children ages two and a half through six. She observed that children who are explicitly taught social graces, such as how to greet someone, how to interrupt politely, how to move through a space without disturbing others, and how to care for their environment, develop a sense of dignity, self-confidence, and genuine consideration for others that cannot be taught through correction alone. Montessori believed that Grace and Courtesy lessons must be modeled and practiced, not merely explained. Research on social-emotional learning (Durlak et al., 2011, Child Development) confirms that structured, explicit instruction in social skills produces significant improvements in prosocial behavior, academic performance, and emotional regulation, with effect sizes comparable to academic interventions.

In the ShillerLearning Grace and Courtesy Activity Pack, we have over a dozen activities designed to help your child gain an understanding of Grace and Courtesy and to incorporate these principles into your home. We even included a Grace and Courtesy board game.

Grace & Courtesy Activity Pack Over a dozen Montessori-inspired activities, a board game, and classic works like Walking the Line View Pack →

Grace and Courtesy activity pack contents

Who Said Manners Have to Be No Fun?

We included classic Montessori works such as Walking the Line, as well as a fun Grace and Courtesy board game. While some of these activities may seem like common sense, much of Grace and Courtesy consists of life skills that children genuinely need to be taught and to practice. This pack may be used over an extended period of time, and you will likely find yourself returning to some of these activities again and again.

It is our hope that little by little, these works will help your child see the world in a new way and look for ways to care for others. These works can be used by all ages, although many of the activities are geared toward preschool and early elementary. Some activities are also well suited for use spontaneously when a need arises to work through conflict, frustration, or a situation that calls for a different approach.

These are especially useful when you want to try a new approach. If your child has difficulty with specific behaviors, there are activities in this pack such as the Quiet Game or Preparing and Serving Food that open the conversation around manners in an engaging way. Discipline also has its place in helping children understand that their actions have consequences.

Grace and Courtesy Montessori activities

Some of these activities may also be incorporated into role-play. Parents and other adults in a child's life are always the best examples. Our children are always watching and imitating the ways we interact with others. Grace and Courtesy skills are skills we work on throughout our lives, and skills we can model for the benefit of those we mentor.

Tips for Parents to Model Grace and Courtesy

🌿 13 Ways to Model Grace and Courtesy Every Day

Avoid talking on your cell phone when at the store, bank, or other locations where you will be interacting with employees.
Demonstrate speaking with a calm, quiet, and clear voice.
Look people in the eye when speaking to them.
Ask before hugging or touching others.
Call cashiers, servers, librarians, and others by their name when thanking them; this small step makes a meaningful difference to them and teaches your child how to interact politely.
Demonstrate pushing in your chair, hanging up your coat, and taking careful care of your environment.
Communicate when you need some time alone, and when you have strong feelings that may mean you need a little extra space.
Speak in the positive during challenging situations and suggest positive solutions.
Ask your child if you can join them in watching them work, playing with them, or joining in an activity.
Use open communication with phrases such as "I feel," "Please," "Thank you," "I appreciate you," "Excuse me," and "May I."
Show how to take turns with another adult.
Write a letter to someone together with your child.
Help anyone you see in need while out and about: carry groceries for someone who needs assistance, hold a door, or reach an item from a high shelf. This can feel a little awkward to develop as a habit, but it sets a powerful example.